Useful Stalking Related Resources
Here I will provide you some tidbits of psychological quality to evaluate if you're hanging around along a potential stalker.
You will also be addressed to various resources (medical, legal, and no-profit) which will be hopefully of an help in case you're dealing with people in need of some serious help.
Always remember that to enable these people is in fact a way to cause damage not only to yourself and the people they are stalking (at the moment or in perspective), but moreover you're responsible for them to not get any help, and therefore being finally able to deal with a regular life out from obsessions and compulsions.
Enjoy the reading:
Extract from the Sexual Harassment Support Page:
"Types of Stalkers and Stalking Patterns" as defined by P.E. Mullen:
The most common, persistent and intrusive of all stalkers, the rejected stalker is obsessed with
someone who is a former romantic partner or friend, and who has ended their relationship with the
stalker, or indicates that he or she intends to end the relationship. Depending on the responses of the
victim, the stalkers goals will vary, and the rejected stalker usually struggles with the complex desire for
both reconciliation and revenge. As Mullen writes, "A sense of loss could be combined with frustration,
anger, jealousy, vindictiveness, and sadness in ever-changing proportions." This stalker may be very
narcissistic, and may feel humiliated by the rejection. In most cases, they will have poor social skills
and a poor social network. They are also the most likely to try to harm the victim in some way, and may
employ intimidation and assault in their pursuit. They may become jealous if their victim enters or
continues a romantic relationship with another person. A history of violence in the relationship with the
partner is not uncommon.
This stalker is looking for revenge against someone who has upset them--it could be someone known
to the stalker or a complete stranger. The behaviors are meant to frighten and distress the victim. The
stalker views the target as being similar to those who have oppressed and humiliated them in the past,
and they may view themselves as someone striking back against an oppressor. Or, the victim could be
a professional believed to have cheated or abused the stalker in some way. Often irrationally paranoid,
this kind of stalker can be the most obsessive and enduring. While the least likely to use physical force,
the resentful stalker is the most likely to verbally threaten the victim. They may use personal threats,
complaints to law enforcement and local government, property damage, theft or killing of pet, letters or
notes on the victim's car or house, breaking into the victim's house or apartment, or watching the victim's
The least common of all the stalkers, this is the classic sexual predator whose plan is to physically or
sexually attack the victim. They are motivated purely by the desire for sexual gratification and power over
their victim. This type of stalker is sexually deviant, has poor social skills, and usually has lower than
normal intelligence. They usually will not have any direct contact with the victim while they are stalking
them. This stalker may engage in such behaviors as surveillance of the victim, obscene phone calls,
fetishism, voyeurism, sexual masochism and sadism, exhibitionism. The victim can be either someone
the stalker knows, or a complete stranger.
The intimacy seeker seeks to establish an intimate, loving relationship with their victim. To them, the
victim is a long sought-after soul mate, and they were meant to be together. Also, they may have the
delusion that the victim is in love with them--usually called erotomania. They may interpret any kind of
response from the victim as encouragement, even negative responses. This stalker may write letters,
send gifts, or call their victim. They may believe the victim owes them love because of all they have
invested in stalking them, and is very resistant to changing their beliefs. The intimacy seeker has an
inflated sense of entitlement, and if they recognize they are being rejected, this stalker may become
threatening, or may try to harm the victim in some way, sometimes using violence. (In this way, they may
become a rejected stalker, see above.) This stalker may become jealous if their victim enters or
continues a romantic relationship with another person. After the rejected stalker, the intimacy seeker is
the most persistent type of stalker. They are usually unresponsive to legal sanctions, viewing them as
challenges to overcome that demonstrate their love for the victim.
The Incompetent Suitor desires a romantic or intimate relationship with the victim but is impaired in their
social and courting skills. This stalker may be very narcissistic, and cut off from victim's feelings (lack of
empathy). The incompetent believes that anyone should be attracted to them. Typically, this stalker will
repeatedly ask for dates, or call on the phone, even after being rejected. They may attempt physical
contact by trying hold the victim's hand or kiss the victim, however, the will not become physically violent
or threatening. The incompetent suitor is less persistent than others, and is likely to have stalked
numerous others in the past, and will probably do so in the future. They will quickly stop stalking if
threatened with legal action or after receiving counseling.
Erotomaniac and Morbidly Infatuated
This stalker believes that the victim is in love with them. They believe this even though the victim has
done nothing to suggest it is true, and may have made statements to the contrary. The erotomaniac
reinterprets what their victim says and does to support the delusion, and is convinced that the imagined
romance will eventually become a permanent union. This stalker may suffer from acute paranoia, and
typically chooses a victim of higher social status. They will repeatedly try to approach and communicate
with their supposed lover, and is typically unresponsive to threats of legal action of any kind. Without
psychological treatment, this stalker is likely to continue with their activities.
Cyberstalking and Cyberstalkers
Cyberstalking is an extension of the physical act of stalking; however, the behavior occurs using
electronic mediums, such as the Internet and computer sypware. Someone who is physically stalking
an individual may employ cyberstalking as another means to pursue, harass, or force contact. Or,
cyberstalking may be the sole means of surveillance and pursuit of the victim. The stalker may join
forums they know their target frequents, and pose as someone else in an attempt to contact their target,
or they may contact other members to get information about the target or defame their character. They
may use spyware to access their target's computer and the personal information contained within.
Given the vast distances that the Internet spans, a "pure" cyberstalker will never move beyond electronic
mediums and into physical stalking. Still, this does not mean that the behavior is any less distressing,
frightening, or damaging, and a cyberstalker's motives can fit any of the categories described above.
Moreover, given the ability of individuals to ‘mask’ their identity when using the Internet, linking the
harassment to one particular individual can be difficult. Programs that mask IP (Internet Protocol)
addresses, and anonymous remailers are merely two examples that hinder the identification of the
stalker and their (digital) location.
Who Becomes a Stalker
Stalkers are usually isolated and lonely, coming from the "disadvantaged" of our society; however, a
stalker can occupy any place in our entire social spectrum. Often, the stalking may be triggered by a
significant trauma or loss in the life of the perpetrator, usually within at least seven years of the stalking
behavior. (For example, relationship dissolution or divorce, job termination, loss/potential loss of a
child, or an ill parent.) Most stalkers are not psychotic. In a comparative study of psychotic versus non-
psychotic stalkers (Mullen et al. 1999), 63% of the sample was found to be suffering from a common
psychiatric condition, such as major depression, personality disorder, or substance dependence--with
personality disorder being the most common diagnosis.
Ex-intimates: Common stalkers are people who previously shared a romantic relationship with the
victim, and former intimates are the most common type of stalking target. This can be either from a
long or short term relationship.
Family members: A stalker may target a member of their family, such as a parent or sibling. This would
most likely be a resentful or rejected stalker, and they would target a family member they feel had
rejected, humiliated, or abused them in the past.
Friends and Acquaintances: The victim may be stalked by an intimacy seeker or an incompetent suitor
motivated by a desire to start a romantic relationship with the victim. The victim may be stalked by a
resentful stalker, typically a neighbor, who may be involved in a disagreement with the victim about
something such as noise, the location of a tree, or pets.
Workplace Contacts: In their study of stalkers, Mullen (et al) found that 23% had a professional
relationship with their victim, most often a medical practitioner. Other stalkers may be supervisors,
fellow employees, service providers, clients, or others who show up at the victim's workplace. Stalking
behaviors directed at the victim may include: sexual harassment, physical and sexual assaults,
robberies, or even homicide. A violent workplace stalker usually has a history of poor job performance,
a high rate of absenteeism, and a record of threats and confrontations with people they resent in the
The United States Justice Department found that in the U.S., between the years 1992 and 1996 over 2
million people were the victims of violent crime in the workplace. This included:
1.5 million assaults
Over 1000 homicides (disgruntled employees--usually resentful stalkers--are responsible
most workplace homicides.
Victims often do not tell their co-workers or supervisors about the person who is stalking them because
they fear reprisals from the stalker or other employees, don't think they will be believed, or feel
embarrassed about the situation. (For other reasons, see Confusion and Denial, on the home page)
Doctors, nurses, psychologists, or other healthcare providers may become the targets of stalking by
obsessed clients or patients. (Or the other way around) Teachers may become stalked by students.
(Or the other way around.) Psychiatrists are at particular risk for being the targets of stalking because of
their contact with people with psychiatric conditions.
Strangers: These are most commonly Intimacy Seekers and Incompetent Suitors, but may also be
Predatory stalkers or Resentful stalkers. These stalkers may hide their identity from their victims at first,
and reveal it after stalking their victim for some time in order to get closer to them. Victims may be
initially flattered when stalker approaches them and respond politely. They may even agree to go on a
date with their stalker, after many requests. This can have the unintentional effect of encouraging the
stalker, and making them believe that their love is reciprocated.
Gender: Stalkers are far more likely to be male, however, women can also become stalkers. Women
are more likely to target someone they have known, usually a professional contact. Men are less likely
to pursue other men, while females will often target other females. The majority of female stalkers are
intimacy seekers seeking to establish relationships, whereas men show a broader range of
motivations, and are more often to be seeking to restore relationships. Women are as likely to use
violence as men, and there does not tend to be a difference between genders regarding the duration of
a stalking. Thus, while the contexts and motives for stalking may differ between men and women, the
intrusiveness of the behaviors and potential for harm does not.
Cyberstalking and protective measures
Please, relate to Privacy Rights Clearinghouse for further resources.
Extracts from Fact Sheet 14: Are You Being Stalked?
1. What Is Stalking?
Stalking refers to harassing or threatening behavior that is engaged in repeatedly. Such harassment can be either physical stalking or cyberstalking.
- Physical stalking is following someone, appearing at a person’s home or place of business, making harassing phone calls, leaving written messages or objects, or vandalizing one’s property.
- Cyberstalking involves using the Internet or other electronic means to harass. A January 2009 U.S. Department of Justice report found that 23% of stalking victims suffered some form of cyberstalking, and 6% suffered electronic monitoring such as spyware, bugging or video surveillance. (Bureau of Stalking Statistics, Stalking Victimization in the United States)
In recent years stalkers have seized on the anonymity of the Internet to commit their crimes. This has added a new dimension because many victims of cyberstalking don’t
know the identity of the stalkers. That can make the fear more palpable and prosecution more unlikely.
It is difficult to define cyberstalking because it can appear in so many forms. As technology evolves, so does the practice of cyberstalking. A web-savvy stalker can wreak havoc on the online life of a victim. This can be incredibly damaging, particularly as more people use the Internet to pay bills, make friends, date, work, share ideas and find jobs.
Some examples of tactics a cyberstalker may use include:
- Sending manipulative, threatening, lewd or harassing emails from an assortment of email accounts.
- Hacking into a victim’s online accounts (such as banking or email) and changing the victim’s settings and passwords.
- Creating false online accounts on social networking and dating sites, impersonating the victim or attempting to establish contact with the victim by using a false persona.
- Posting messages to online bulletin boards and discussion groups with the victim’s personal information, such as home address, phone number or Social Security number. Posts may also be lewd or controversial – and result in the victim receiving numerous emails, calls or visits from people who read the post online.
- Signing up for numerous online mailing lists and services using a victim’s name and email address.
Cyberstalking is difficult to combat because the stalker could be in another state or sitting three cubicles away from the victim. In the anonymous world of the Internet, it is difficult to verify a stalker’s identity, collect the necessary evidence for an arrest and then trace the cyberstalker to a physical location.
For a list of state cyberstalking laws, see the National Conference of State Legislature’s State Electronic Harassment or "Cyberstalking" Laws .
If you are a victim of cyberstalking, try to gather as much physical evidence as possible and document each contact. For more information and tips, visit the National Center for Victims of Crimes webpage: If You Are a Victim of Cyberstalking. You may also call the National Center for Victims of Crimes hotline at 1-800-FYI-CALL or email them at email@example.com.
The fact that cyberstalking doesn’t involve physical contact doesn’t mean it is any less dangerous than “real life” stalking. It’s not difficult for an experienced Internet user to find enough of the victim’s personal information, such as phone number or place of business, to establish his or her physical location.
Social networking, through websites such as Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, Meetup and LinkedIn, present security issues for victims of stalking. A profile on a social network might include information such as your email address, phone number, general (or even specific) address information, birthday, legal name, names of family members, and even minute-to-minute updates on your location. (Read Stalking Resource Center's Social Networking Sites: A Bonanza for Stalkers?)
If a victim has a public profile, a stalker could easily access any information posted to the social networking account. Even with strong privacy settings or a private profile, a stalker might be able to access your account. A few of the ways this can be accomplished include:
- Hacking your account
- Creating a false profile and sending a "friend request" or "follow request." The request may even appear to be from a known friend or family member. Verify with your friends and family members that they own the account before accepting the request.
- Gaining access to the accounts of your already-established connections (such as Facebook friends or Twitter followers).
If you are a victim of stalking, consider suspending your social networking accounts until the stalking has been resolved. If you decide to continue to use social networking sites, here are a few tips to help keep you safe:
- Set your profile to "Private." With some social networking sites, this might entail just checking a box. With others, such as Facebook, this can be a complex, multi-step process. Read Ars Technica's Updated Guide to Facebook Privacy for a step-by-step guide to heightening security on your Facebook profile.
Limit how much personal information you post to your account. For
example, you may not want to include contact information, your birth date, the city you were born in or names of family members.
- Do not accept "friend requests" (or "follow requests") from strangers. If you recognize the individual sending the request, contact him or her off-line to verify he or she sent the request.
- Warn your friends and acquaintances not to post personal information about you, especially your contact information and location.
- Avoid online polls or quizzes, particularly those that ask for personal information.
Don't post photographs of your home that might indicate its location. For example, don't post photographs showing a house
number or an identifying landmark in the background.
Use caution when joining online organizations, groups or "fan pages." Never publicly RSVP to events shown online.
- Use caution when connecting your cell phone to your social networking account. If you do decide to connect your cell phone to your online account, use extreme caution in providing live updates on your location or activities.
Avoid posting information about your current or future locations, or providing information a stalker may later use to hone in
on your location, such as a review of a restaurant near your house.
- Always use a strong, unique password for every social networking site. Read our 10 Rules for Creating a Hacker-Resistant Password.
Final tip: remember, you most likely will not know if your stalker has accessed your online social networking account.
Only post information that would not expose you to harm if your stalker should read it.
The reality is that both cyberstalking and physical stalking can lead to a physical attack. Always get help quickly, document all stalking incidents and take precautions to protect yourself.
FOR A COMPLETE LIST OF TIPS TO AVOID CYBERSTALKING; PLEASE CLICK HERE